More Than A Melody
Photographed and Written By:
Meghan O’Connell Smith
As an emerging female artist, Caroline White steps into her responsibility as a musician, she discovers there is something more to be made than just a tune. That’s the root of it. It started with a pain that was so deeply embedded within, the outside could never parallel. “Everything I was showing people was a lie,” Caroline says about the stage of her life when she was writing her first songs. “That’s why I play music, to show the deeper truth that I couldn’t speak, that no one would speak.”
Caroline’s music is more than just a charming refrain you would hear on the radio. Her music suddenly dives deep into dark places you don’t want to go alone. Her words become personal as the songs develop and grow, and you feel as though you are along the same journey.
The same journey of brokenness and despair, but an entirely different circumstance. None of us will be Caroline at 20 years old during the darkest, loneliest moments of her life- but we can all listen to deep, cutting words that take us all to our own personal moments of isolation and guiding us to find hope in the connection. Caroline’s music has the power to take you to an unfavorable part of your life, whether it be broken relationships with others or broken a relationship yourself. Her personal journey with discovering music came with the lowest points of her life.
A young, beautiful 21-year-old with a seemingly grand life has struggled internally with overwhelming depression and anxiety, invading multiple areas of her life leaving her to feel isolated in her own body. During her sophomore year of college when her depression was at an all-time high, she had no choice but to express her raw feelings uniquely.
“Her skies are painted blue,” she writes in her first song about depression. “This was my way of introducing to the world that I wasn’t okay. I was pretending,” she says about the beginning stages of her career.
As she continued to dive into herself as an artist, she found the process brought difficulty. Her struggles between vulnerability and fear often left her stuck in the creative process.
“I had to learn I couldn’t be perfect, and that was hard. I don’t think anything that I create is ever going to be perfect and that is what makes it art. It’s all a leap of faith, and I can only hope that it will go beyond me.”
As Caroline has claimed herself as a musician, affirming signs were coming at all angles. The more she put out into the world, whether it be performing or posting trailers for a personal documentary coming soon, people were hungry for more. People are drawn to the vulnerability in her music because it brings a certain humanity to a song, as well as relates people to the idea that we all are struggling.
“I want people to hear more than just a melody, or the way the song sounds. I want people to see the meaning behind the words and feel hope in the connection we can have. You never know who you can reach. I hope people can hear the realness in my music, step back and say, ‘wow, she just told a bunch of people a thing that is really hard to tell a bunch of people.’ ” Caroline responds when asked why she produces the music she does. Isn’t that the point of music? To unite us all under the wing of humanity and bring us back to our roots? We all struggle with being broken people, with waking up some days feeling on top of our shit and others in complete and utter desolation.
After writing songs about depression, she realized she wanted to write more than songs about heartbreak. She wanted her solemn music to be more than just another breakup song.
When asked, “How do you know this is what you’re made to do?”, Caroline responded, “Through my relationship with God I have gotten a lot of confirmation that this is what I’m supposed to be doing. Some of that has come from the connections and reactions people have had with my music. It’s a huge reminder that my music can help people who might be struggling.”
At the peak of her depression in college, Caroline felt so alone. The pressures to show she was fine weighed her and locked the truth of her feelings within.
“I don’t want people to feel alone. You never know who needs to hear a song about something that they think they’re alone in.”
She knew there was more than the marine biology degree she first came to college for. From the sparks she felt when she saw others perform to the times she began to sing for people, she knew there was nothing else to do other than this. Caroline has big dreams for her music, one of them being that it invites people into a place of discomfort to realize we all can be comfortable if we are united together in the tough things.
She has been writing and recording for a couple of months now and plans to have an EP out in the fall of 2018. Keep an eye out for that early release single though! Next thing we know, Caroline White will be playing her songs in her homeland at the Tabernacle!